Defining the New Mayoral Morality

By Gary Morton, Feb 11.2010

Citizensontheweb.ca city election page.

     With Adam Giambrone’s exit from the 2010 Toronto mayoral race still fresh it’s a good time to examine exactly what moral standards we are applying to candidates.

    Well, to begin, we the people are applying none, and neither is the church or ministers or other legitimate moral authorities.  The new moral standards are applied by corporate media. In this case the Toronto Star. And though moral standards applied by the church, such as its opposition to gay marriage and so on are challenged, no one challenges the divine right of trashy media types to apply moral standards they simply and arbitrarily make up.

    The Toronto Star arbitrarily decided that Adam Giambrone was unfit for office because he had multiple affairs. A first question here being how does a person who is not married have an affair? The actual truth is Giambrone had rather dumb casual relationships and a live in partner he used as a political prop. He fits in perfectly with the moral standards and behaviour of his generation.

    In his case media paints him as immature due to silly text messages and so on. Yet if  he were older he’d be painted as a Clinton-type lecher. Another thing to be considered in this application of morality is that the Star’s coverage from the beginning indicated that they wanted Giambrone outed. What they want is a mayoral race between Smitherman and Rocco Rossi where Smitherman wins. Or possibly a Ruby Dhalla candidacy, but that would be provisional on whether she wants to sell off city services like George and Rocco.

     So let’s get back to the morality issue. Say a candidate has sex with a donkey … whoops, let’s leave the donkey out … I mean a boy, er sorry, I mean three women. That’s it and I’m hanging my hat on it – three women.  Now I hope you’re not getting lost here, because like the candidates we call of mayoral quality, I can’t even write my own damn speech. I can’t write a thing without assistance but for some reason I and the elite of our society feel that I’m qualified to be mayor.

      Now I’ve had casual sex with the three women, I’m married to another man and have a dirty talk partner on the cell. Will the Toronto Star out me or do I pass their morality test?

     Or how about this … I announce my candidacy with a media release stating that I’m a devout Christian and I’m leading a life of celibacy. You don’t have to worry about me getting caught in sexual immorality because I’ve been sexless for two decades. I’m a safe candidate and I’m certainly a candidate that has no chance of being elected because no one would believe me and if they did they wouldn’t want to vote for someone that really is completely moral and completely unlike everyone else in society.

    So maybe we should look to honestly and genuine talent. The candidates I see in this race look like either fringe kooks or shady types that want to sell off the city. Smitherman being a guy that does massive back room deals like the SAMSUNG wind deal without even consulting his peers or the public. Perhaps the worst thing about this crop of candidates is that they are at least honest about their bad intentions.

    Their sexual morality? Who even gets that far? Not me, other than to say that we’re living in a sick society if the Star is our moral arbiter.

    Now for the final question. Suppose two of the mayoral candidates have sex with each other. Is it allowed?
   Wait a minute. Bruce la Bruce is directing this porn shot and he’s shouting. “No one’s gonna buy this turkey! Not even triple strength Viagra works on these lame losers. We got to do something to save this scene!”
   Oh oh, now he’s bringin’ in the donkey. Sorry I said I was going to leave it out.

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